


Vlogger Confessions

by wematch



Category: Carry On - Rainbow Rowell
Genre: Fluff, M/M, Roommates, SnowBaz, YouTube, Youtuber AU, carry on au, snowbaz au, vlogger simon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-16
Updated: 2017-04-19
Packaged: 2018-10-23 22:40:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,219
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10728750
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wematch/pseuds/wematch
Summary: Youtuber AU where Simon is a daily vlogger and Baz has no idea what his roommate is always filming.





	1. Chapter 1

Classes are about to start next week and since I didn’t like the idea of living in the dorm, I’ve been looking at flats the whole morning. I’m hoping this one will be better than the previous two, since it’s close to the university, close enough that I can walk there.

I arrive and knock at the door. It takes a while but suddenly the door opens, and I can’t seem to be able to breath.

The guy standing at the door has soft curls and few moles on his face, he’s beautiful. He also has a questioning look on his face, like he doesn’t know why I’m here.

“Uh…hello, can I help you?” Fuck, he really doesn’t know. I called him two days ago.

“Simon Snow right? I came to check the room that you want to rent?” Moron.

He’s looking really embarrassed now “Oh…it’s already 11am? I’m so sorry, I lost track of time” I roll my eyes at that.

He lets me in, he’s blushing and saying some excuse, but I am not really listening. The living room is a mess, there are some boxes in the table, and a tripod with a camera in front of the couch, I want to ask what he’s been doing with that but I decide not to.

When Snow shows me the room, he’s still blushing for some reason and it looks great on him.

**

Two days before classes start, Fiona helps me bring my stuff up, and Snow insists on helping. She’s telling him a ridiculous story that happened a few years ago, and I just roll my eyes, of course she had to embarrass me in front of him, he’s laughing now and I realize a few seconds later that I’m staring.

Fiona gives me a knowing look, before she leaves.

When I’m bringing my last box from the living room, Snow comes from his door too and he’s talking, and at first I think he’s talking to someone on the phone, but he’s holding a camera and pointing it at himself. I raise one eyebrow, do I really want to ask what he’s doing?

When he notices me looking, he stops and starts blushing. “Sorry… Didn’t know you were here” and just leaves in a rush.

A few days pass and I barely see him in the flat. Sometimes one of his friends comes to fetch him, and he doesn’t come back until night, like today. I’m sitting, reading a book on the couch, when he arrives.

He’s holding a camera with his mouth, and has grocery bags in his arms. Perhaps I should help him, but I prefer to watch the stupid face he’s doing, like he’s surprised to see me here, again.

He drops everything in the counter and does something to his camera, wait was that recording? “Baz! How you’ve been? Didn’t know you were here.”

I roll my eyes, “You do know that I live here now, right?”

“Sorry, I just had so much to do today, had a project that took way longer to film than I was expecting.”

**

A few weeks have passed and Snow is still a mystery to me, he spends a lot of time outside of the house, so I think he goes to classes somewhere, and where he goes his camera goes too. I’m pretty sure he filmed me a few times now.

I think that today he’s doing something in the living room, there’s a tripod in there just like the first day I came here, and he kept asking me if I was going to the library, like I usually do every week on Saturday.

Snow wants me out of the apartment, and I’m determined to see why, so instead of staying in the library, I decide to just go and get my books.

I’m at the door and I can hear him talking, so I try to open the door as quietly as I can.

Snow has is laptop in the coffee table and he’s talking to his camera again, and his face is in the computer too. I realize that I can see myself in the background, the moment he stops in the middle of a sentence, frowning at the screen “You want to know who that is? Oh yeah thats Baz” and freezes.

“What the fuck are you doing?” I ask him, because he’s talking about me, and there seems to be a chat going on the screen.

“Sorry guys, gotta go for today, see you all soon!” and shuts down the chat thing.

“What was that?” He’s looking really embarrassed, and I should stop admiring the way he’s looking right now, with his eyes closed.

He takes a deep breath “I’m… a youtuber, I’m sorry I should have told you sooner.”

Oh. Of course. That explains the cameras, ”Why didn’t you?”

“People don’t really like it, they think it’s weird that I’m talking to a camera.”

“Well, It does look weird.” It really does, but at least now everything is starting to make sense.

“I tried to film as much as I can outside the house, so I wouldn’t bother you, but I really needed to film inside today” He’s looking sadly at his hands.

“Look Snow, if that’s your thing it’s fine, I don’t mind it as long as you don’t leave those tripods all over the place” because he keeps stumbling on them.


	2. Chapter 2

I don’t really care about the cameras anymore, I’m used to him talking around the flat.

I’ve been wondering what’s like, to see his vlogs. From what I can see, he always tries to be an optimistic person on camera, and film funny little things that he wants to share.

The problem now, is that he’s always here. I just got home from classes and he’s trying to open a letter, while also trying to vlog and it’s ridiculous.

He notices me, “Hey Baz can you uh… help me?” I roll my eyes, but I do before going to my bedroom.

The problem of him being here all the time, is because he keeps distracting me. If I’m in the living room, he starts talking to me or makes me go with him grab some scones, he’s addicted to the bloody thing.

**

It’s Saturday and Snow is doing a live show again, he asks me to say hello to everyone and I do. I would do anything, if he always rewarded me with his stupid smiles, like he’s doing right now.

“Do you want me to bring you scones on my way home?” He gives me an even bigger smile, when I ask him.

In the evening, I’m in my bed when I call him over.

“Need anything?” He says, with his laptop in one hand and then he starts to enter my bedroom, “Can I sit too? I need to edit.”

“You may not” I tell him but he doesn’t stop. To my disgrace, Snow has already learned that sometimes, I say things I don’t mean.

Having him in my bed, with only a few inches separating us, feels like torture. I keep glancing at him, because his mouth is slightly open. All I can do is imagine myself reach for him, turn his face in my direction and kiss him, then bite his lip to see what he would do.

“If Penny comes here tomorrow, can you ask her to bring my book?” This wasn’t what I wanted to ask, but I called him over so I had to say something.

Sometimes he lets me see him edit, like now. He’s fast cutting pieces and putting them together, in order for the final version. I’m in there sometimes, in the footage, he asked me if it was okay and I said I don’t mind really mind.

Perhaps tomorrow I can ask to see his videos, for some reason, Snow is still embarrassed about them.

**

I knock on his door and when I enter. He’s laying down on his bed, almost asleep editing a video. If I didn’t know better, I would say that he’s looking like this just to mess with me.

“Hey Baz” and he gives me a sleepy smile. I can feel myself beginning to blush.

“I can see that you’re busy, we can talk tomorrow.”

“No no, you can stay, I’ve just finished editing anyway.”

“Can I see it?” Because he just said that I can stay, and I’m feeling bold so I decide to sit on his bed to make my point, “Come on Snow, I appear in your videos, only fair you let me see them.”

He’s looking at me, like he’s trying to figure me out “Okay fine, I’ll show you today’s video, It’s not long so you won’t get bored.”

If only he knew how much I like listening to him, about random things. I even heard him complaining about me once, I almost laughed at how ridiculous it all was.

As soon as the vlog starts though, I know that this was a bad idea. He’s in bed, saying good morning to everyone, telling them that he’s gonna meet Penny later on and that they’re gonna go to the beach. I can’t stop looking at his chest, there’s a constellation of little moles painted there, that I desperately want to have a closer look.

When he’s about to leave the house, I appear in the vlog to give him his scones, he thanks me before leaving, and keeps talking about how such a nice roommate I am.

I glance at him and he’s blushing, but not taking his eyes off the screen. The rest of the vlog is just him and Penny, almost getting attacked by a seagull because they were eating fish and chips, and I laugh at that.

He’s laughing lightly by my side too, and I love how good this feels, feeling his body heat because our shoulders and legs are touching, and I have to restrain myself to not get closer to him.

When we finish, I ask to see another video, which takes him a few moments, but he chooses one called _dragging my roommate outside_ , and I snort because I remember that day all too well.

He had a camera in one hand and was trying to convince me to go to the beach, to which I said no several times, so he just grabbed my hand and pulled me, until we were out of the building.

That was a good day, we grabbed some food and went to the pier. Snow wanted to make a timelapse of the sunset, so we just sat there talking and looking at the sea. The end result of the timelapse was actually quite good so I praise him for that. The video finishes with him in bed, saying he had a great time with me.

I’m looking at him and I realize that I’m falling in love with this moron, fuck. I’m falling for Simon and this is not going to end well.


	3. Chapter 3

Yesterday I noticed that his YouTube name is snowscones, so now I’m watching his videos. I lost count at how many I saw in a row. I decided to start watching from the video called _I finally moved_ dated a few months ago and go from there.

It takes me a week, of making marathons of his vlogs at night, but I’m almost up to date. 

Snow saw me watching his videos, and was very nervous about it, but I reassured him that I really enjoy them.

Not just because I can look at him as much as I want, but because it’s really relaxing seeing someone go on about their day. He always tries to go somewhere, even if it’s just to try some coffee shop or fly his stupid drone somewhere remote.

**

Next Saturday, Snow is doing his live chat, and I’m on my way to the library when he calls my name “Baz! People have been waiting for you!”

“What” which is no answer, but then again, I don’t really know what to say to that.

“Do you wanna be in my chat? Just five minutes” He knows I can’t say no, not when he’s looking at me like a lost puppy.

“Fine Snow, just don’t ask weird stuff.”

He turns to the laptop with a big smile “Okay guys, you’ve been requesting this for a while now, so Baz is gonna join us for a few minutes, if you wanna ask him anything, now is your chance!”

As I’m sitting next to him, the comments start to go crazy and saying Snowbaz with a bunch of hearts, what is Snowbaz? I start to frown at the screen, trying to read some explanation in the comments.

Snow is looking at the screen to find something interesting, clearly ignoring everything saying Snowbaz.

“Okay Baz first question, what is it like to live with me?”

It’s a torture because I want to kiss you but I can’t, I wanna say, “Awful, you’re a pig.”

He snorts “I’m not that bad and you know it.”

Fine Penny’s roommate is way worse. He makes me a few more questions, but then stops looking at the chat and turns to me.

“Why do you keep frowning at the screen?”

“Trying to find what does Snowbaz mean.”

“What uh..that’s nothing” he looks away embarrassed, for some reason.

“What is it Snow?”

“It’s… a ship name” and he’s blushing like I’ve never seen him before “okay let me find you another question.”

He’s changing the subject, and that really annoys me, because I don’t really understand what that’s supposed to mean, “No” I tell him before turning to the laptop “What is Snowbaz?”

And immediately the comments go crazy again, they’re appearing so fast that I can barely read them, and I can feel Snow looking at me, waiting for me to read. 

Then I finally read what it is and _oh_ , shit is this real, people want us together? which is pissing me off, because clearly he doesn’t care about it at all. He wouldn’t dismiss it like that if he did, _fuck_. I need to get out of here before I say something stupid, “Oh, I see.”

“They just like us together, that’s all” and he shrugs, he fucking shrugs this away, I feel like he just punched me.

“Yeah whatever, I should go now anyway” and I just leave without looking at him.

 


	4. Chapter 4

We’ve been avoiding each other for the past week, and it’s weird. He’s been out of the house pretty much the whole day, seems like we are back to when he was ashamed of vlogging in front of me.

I’m currently in my bed, trying to read a book but I can’t focus, I can’t keep bloody Snow out of my mind. So because I’m weak and I miss him, I decide to catch up on him.

Apparently I’m only a couple of days behind on his vlogs, he didn’t vlog on the first few days after his live chat.

The one that I’m currently watching, he’s saying sorry, that he just decided to take a few days off. 

What’s up with him? He’s out in the beach, but he doesn’t seem to be his usual self. Even when he goes to that coffee shop, that we usually go eat scones, he’s smiling but he’s not happy.

The third vlog which was two days ago, is a short one, and Snow mentions that he noticed people in the comments asking what is wrong with him, he tells them not to worry because he’s fine. Which clearly is a lie.

I decide to check the comments, I never read them because they seem rather pointless, but in this video people are discussing theories about what happened. I read my name in there and what the fuck? One of the top comments is saying, that we had a fight because of the chat, so that’s why Simon looks so broken.

Hold on, they think I’m the one that caused this? People are all agreeing that I must have said something to upset him. That I didn’t like hearing about Snowbaz. Which no, I totally support it, I want it to be real more than anyone.

Instead of replying anything stupid, I decide to check his video of yesterday called we need to have a chat. He went with Penny to some meeting, with a few fans that won a competition, but now in the vlog, it’s night and he’s in bed.

“I had so much fun meeting everyone this afternoon, but I think I need to make something clear, I noticed some comments about Baz and even this afternoon people asked me what happened between us, but he did nothing wrong, so please don’t make him the bad guy…”

He takes a deep breath and passes his hand through his hair, he’s looking so broken right now, “It’s not his fault how I feel about him and you guys notice things, but we were never more than friends so please leave him alone, he never asked for any of this” I pause the video.

Did Simon just said he had feelings for me? Is this a fucking joke?

I storm into his bedroom with my laptop.

“What the fuck Snow?“

He jumps at my sudden entrance and blinks stupidly at me “What.”

I go back a few seconds and press play.

“Stop…” he mumbles to his knees.

I’m so pissed at him right now, why didn’t he said something sooner “Do you mean it?”

He whispers “Just drop it Baz, please.”

I sit on the edge of the bed near him, “Look at me, do you mean it?”

He’s still looking down and I need to see his eyes, I need to make sure this is real, that I’m not fucking dreaming. With my hand I raise his chin up, and when he looks at me he just spits it out angrily “Of course, why would I-” I don’t let him finish, I just kiss him.

Simon has his hand on my hair and he’s pulling me closer. The kiss is getting sloppy and desperate and it’s perfect. 

Fuck, I’ve been wanting to do this since the first day I saw him.

**

Later on, we are cuddling in his bed watching silly videos when I tell him, “I still can’t believe that I found out, that you liked me back in one of your vlogs.”

“I know, Penny is gonna love it. She kept saying that I should just talk to you, but I thought that there’s no way you liked me back.”

“Why did you said it in your video then? You know that I watch them.”

“Well…” He starts blushing.

“Oh, no way….Snow, you didn’t.”

“I tried to tell you in person, but it was easier like this.”

“You confessed your feelings in the vlog so that I would watch it, you’re ridiculous.”

He shrugs “Yeah well, It worked didn’t it.”

I put my hand on his neck to bring him closer. I kiss his moles one by one, making a path to his mouth, then I kiss him slowly on his lips and when we stop for air I whisper, “It did.”

 


End file.
